by Ryan Woerner | Feb 20, 2019 | Short Stories
Newspapers fell to the floor as he tapped away at the keyboard, his fingers gliding across the keys while his eyes remained locked on the screen to what many mothers would agree was an unhealthy degree. They darted back and forth at times as windows were opened and...
by Ryan Woerner | Jan 22, 2019 | Short Stories
It lasted just a moment – maybe a half a moment – no more than a blip on the timeline that spanned 16 years of life for Archibald West. But that moment – that blip – was all Archie needed to become completely convinced something was different about him –...
by Ryan Woerner | Oct 25, 2018 | Blog, General Writing
Introduction Or, The Significance of Certain Numbers The number 182 is significant for a large number of reasons to a large number of people. If you are, for instance, a Greek basketball fan, your brain may associate that number first with the number of games in a...
by Ryan Woerner | Jul 30, 2018 | Books
Buy It From Boston College Buy It From Someone Else All The Dirty Parts By: Daniel Handler With my OJ kick waning (for the time being) I’ve turned to a book by one of my favorite authors of all time. And let me tell you, he sure says “cock” way more...
by Ryan Woerner | Jul 25, 2018 | Books
Buy It On B&N Buy It Elsewhere OJ Is Innocent and I Can Prove It By: OJ Simpson Bill Dear Book number two in my endless journey to get to the bottom of the OJ Simpson case. You all trust me to solve this one, so the pressure is resting squarely on me right now,...
by Ryan Woerner | Jul 24, 2018 | Books
Buy It On Amazon Buy It Elsewhere If I Did It By: OJ Simpson And His ghostwriter Pablo And Fred Goldman And Kim Goldman And Donald Trump This was (naturally) the first book I read when I got on my OJ Simpson kick after watching “The People vs. OJ” on...
by Ryan Woerner | May 1, 2018 | Short Stories
The word was stuck in my throat, unmoving, unwilling to budge even an inch, trepidation apparent in my voice despite the fact that I hadn’t even mustered up the courage to speak. It wasn’t the word itself that had found its way lodged in my throat, it was the message...
by Ryan Woerner | Jan 15, 2017 | Short Stories
“Honey, please don’t forget to take your medication,” said Haley Dutessa, poking her head through doorway leading from the kitchen to the living room, where her husband James sat, typing away on his laptop. Having heard what sounded like his wife coming up their...
by Ryan Woerner | Jan 11, 2017 | Short Stories
…And then, as a thank you to the staff that had just elected him President of the company, George fired each and every one of them. Except, of course, Patricia. Like an old man visiting his childhood home, the two of them would periodically return to that spot...
by Ryan Woerner | Dec 15, 2016 | General Writing
As fall begins to yield to the throes of winter, the time we spend outdoors grows smaller and smaller, the blistering wind forcing us from our football fields, our playgrounds and our above ground post-Trump nuclear war bunkers to the safety and warmth of the indoors....